Finishing Well

God’s Unfailing Patience and Guidance

God is patient and kind.  Loving and all-knowing.  He has truly never left me and has always been guiding me.

Eight Years of Singleness and God’s Faithful Presence

As I write, I am about to observe eight years of singleness.  Every birthday has been unique and special with God showing me such detail and love knowing exactly what I needed that particular birthday.  One year it was gifts and cards.  One year it was quite simply a day of rest.  He knows me better than I know myself.

He has challenged me, held me, loved me, and purified me in ways I didn’t know I needed.  He gave me five years to prepare to move.  I have sold things, donated things, gifted things.  And yet there was always more.

Letting Go of the Old to Step Into the New

You have to let go of the old to step into the new.  Life as I knew it was ending.  Nothing would ever be the same and yet I had no idea what that meant.  Waiting.  Trusting.  Knowing He is a good God who only asks of me what is good for me.

Faith Through Delays, Courts, and God’s Timing

In the spring, years after this journey started when he spoke to my heart, saying “you will be in your new place by Christmas.”  I took him at his word.  I had no idea where I was going, but I knew he did.  I didn’t know the journey, but I trusted him.  I had watched him move on my behalf more than I could have ever dreamed.

I don’t know how we got from one court date to the next.  Postponements.  Delays.  God’s grace on this widow.  But after hearing from him, I knew something would be coming in the mail.  Soon came the notification and court was scheduled for June 1.  I showed up expecting to receive an eviction in thirty days.  Per usual, I let the judge do the speaking.

Judge:  Do you still live in the house?

Me: Yes, sir.

Judge:  Would ninety days help?

Me: Yes, 90 days would be great.

I think the judge was actually sad, but the law is the law.  I didn’t actually have a defense.  The order was written to sell the house in ninety days.  I thanked the judge for his kindness and respect throughout the process.  I actually saw him smile at my acknowledgment.  I can only imagine how hard it is to spend a day a month evicting people from their homes.  I am guessing no one becomes a judge to do that.

It would be another forty days before the order was finalized, therefore the actual sale date was scheduled for 133 days away.  The waiting was over.  The answer had come.  Now what?

Trusting God’s Provision in Uncertainty

Like normal, I took a few days to process the information myself.  Just me and God.  I prayed and had my answer before I shared it with anyone.  Everyone has an opinion.  However, no one has prayed about this as much as I had and no one would live the consequences as much as I would.

I didn’t have any savings.  I didn’t have housing options.  I didn’t know where I would go.  I simply waited for instructions.  I knew that if God had brought me through all of this, he had a plan even if I didn’t know what it was.

I focused on that which was in front of me.  Doing my job. Leading corporate prayer and fasting.  Maintaining my personal regiments.  Clinging to my words of truth realizing my heart really wasn’t shaken.  Staying as close to God as possible.  And taking all the encouragement that I could.

As August rolled around, I believed with everything in me that God had released me to sell the house.  I contacted a friend for confirmation.  A realtor for help.  And began to prepare the house for sale knowing that an October 11 deadline awaited.

If I was going to be in a new place, I needed to find one and so I looked at three potential homes literally in joyful tears as one of these could be my reality.  That would not prove true, but it provided hope in those moments.

A buyer came through but it had to close by October 8th because of the Monday holiday.  Things were not coming together.  I needed an extension.  I was guided through the process and in the middle of that I was fired from my job.

The timing was not missed by me.  I had negotiated staying in the house until the end of the year.  And was offered a severance package that ended at the end of the year.  Ok, God, I thought.  What are you up to?  What do you want me to do?

Negotiations halted in both directions.  It appeared the sale would not proceed.  And we could not agree on the details of the severance package.

I was in the shower one morning talking to God.  I did not want to reject either out of pride or accept either out of fear.  “What do you want me to do?” I asked Him.  I simply want to be obedient.  His reply was, “Do whatever you want to do.  I got you.”   That is almost more scary than him just telling me what to do.

There was no guarantee on the sale of the house, therefore no guarantee of money.  And no severance package meant no income.  I could choose to accept it against my morals and ethics or trust God’s provision and word.  Easy.  “I am okay with that.”   I declined the severance agreement and slept peacefully in the unknown.  A peace that passes all understanding.